2) A plane was cruising smoothly toward Vancouver

LILY: (waving a hand dramatically) “I’m Lily. I’m fabulous. I’m headed to Vancouver—and I’m staying right here.”

Trying not to show her frustration, the flight attendant gently explained,
FLIGHT ATTENDANT: “Miss, you purchased an economy ticket. You’ll need to return to your assigned seat.”

LILY: “I’m Lily, I’m fabulous, I’m headed to Vancouver—and I’m staying right here.”

Seeing she was getting nowhere, the flight attendant excused herself and made her way to the cockpit to inform the crew.

FLIGHT ATTENDANT: “Captain, co-pilot—we’ve got a woman in first class who refuses to leave.”

The co-pilot offered to handle it and walked down the aisle to try his luck.

CO-PILOT: (kindly) “Miss, since your ticket is for economy, I need to ask you to return to your seat.”

LILY: (without missing a beat) “I’m Lily, I’m fabulous, I’m headed to Vancouver—and I’m staying right here.”

Baffled, the co-pilot returned to the cockpit.

CO-PILOT: “I think we’re going to need security when we land. She’s not budging.”

The captain, overhearing the conversation, just chuckled.

PILOT: “Relax. I’ve got this. My wife’s just like her.”

He strolled down the aisle, leaned down, and whispered something into Lily’s ear.

Immediately, Lily’s eyes widened in shock.

LILY: “Oh, I’m so sorry!” she gasped, jumping up and scurrying back to economy without a fuss.

The flight attendant and co-pilot stared at the pilot in amazement.

FLIGHT ATTENDANT: “Captain, what on earth did you say to her?”

The pilot grinned.

PILOT: “Simple. I told her first class isn’t going to Vancouver.”

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